General06 Jul 2006 11:21 am

I think a big reason I wasn’t posting a lot was because

1- My life wasn’t happy. I cured this by quitting Home Depot

2- The spambots had taken over my comments to the extent that I could not keep up. So I added a feature where you have to do a simple math formula to enter a comment… hopefully that will deter them all.

They humiliate you like a regular person: Don’t you know that my privates are a lot bigger than yours?

They try to swoon you with comments about how “awesome” your site is, or leave small inspirational messages:

Don’t walk behind me,
I may not lead.
Don’t walk in front of me,
I may not follow. Just walk beside me and be my friend.

Sometimes, they are so nonsensical you cannot even pull out words to sort through them to find and delete them:
The circumstantial evidence is very strong, especially when you find a trout in the milk.

They also make me feel inadequate, or that they care for me. Here, an ‘ad’ for an anti-anxiety drug: Think of yourself as on the threshold of unparalleled success. A whole, clear, glorious life lies before you.

Tricky buggers.

6 Responses to “Spambots, baleeted.”

  1. on 06 Jul 2006 at 1:19 pm Rhea

    This simple math had me stumped! Curse you Zen! 😛
    Glad to see you’re back online, looking forward to seeing more piccys.

  2. on 06 Jul 2006 at 6:40 pm Jhen

    I’m with Rhea. Can’t wait to hear more from you.

  3. on 06 Jul 2006 at 6:42 pm Jhen

    Oh, also: glad you’re out of the Depot! It’s time for this little bird to fly!

  4. on 09 Jul 2006 at 10:00 am Mark

    Glad to hear you’re back in business, Kelly! Also, I’ve been playing “Brain Age” a lot recently, so this simple math thing might not even stop me from posting. 😉

  5. on 10 Jul 2006 at 9:53 am Premee

    I have only played Brain Age once (using Mark’s, this Saturday), so unlike him I cannot claim that I am unstumpable by simple math. 🙁 But that does seem like a neat way to avoid ye olde spambots. I use the Spam Karma 2 plugin on my blog, which is pretty good and ensures that only about two comments a month need moderation. 🙂

  6. on 10 Jul 2006 at 10:13 am Kelly

    THE SPAMMERS HAVE INFILTRATED THE SIMPLE MATH! I don’t know how, unless it is an actual person doing the posting. If this is the case, good on you buddy. I do not envy your job.